spring term.

good news!  its warming up!  (if it snows again, my wrath will be unleashed upon the universe.)

more good news! i'm doing mentored research in the lab with the woman veterinarian who will be working hardest to get me into vet school.  i'm pulverizing cow manure. yeah, just what i said.

extra good news!!  my niece says my name.  she points at the computer and cries for "BECCA!" when she wants to video chat with me.  i couldn't love her more.


bad news:  i miss people.  i miss my family. i miss anna.  i miss karina, lauren, maren. i miss jeff. i miss amber.  strangely enough i miss brandon.  i want to get out of provo.  i want to go to washington, and california, and idaho.  be that as it may, looks as if i'm stuck here for quite awhile.  weekend trips in the making?  i do believe so.

more bad news: i really miss my puppies.

BUT i have plenty to do here, with my frogs, ochem, and cow manure.  plus, i suppose, dating and social life...which mostly consists of me watching movies with my roommates.

Osama Bin Laden

is dead.

i'm not sure how i feel about it.  i mean, its good news certainly.  but the fact that the death of a person is ever good news is grating to me.  facebook would have you believe that America is the best country in the world because we've killed someone. the leader of a worldwide terrorist organization definitely deserves what he got, but the reaction of the masses is all wrong.  its not wrong to be cheerful at the prospect of an end to the war, but to be so happy that a person has been killed-and dwelling on that one fact alone-is. i fear that in writing this i will be seen as the worst form of non-patriotic trash there is, but someone has to say it.  if this means the end of the war then by all means, lets celebrate.  lets bring our troops home.  but if this is just another number in the ever growing tally of deaths caused by this war, there's really no reason to cheer. Obama's speech last night was good, but i'd like to hear more about bringing our soldiers home.

what i hate about long standing wars/world disasters is how easily they fade to the background of daily life.  i freely admit my guilt. i think about what i have been doing these past ten years and am almost ashamed that more of my time was not spent thinking about what was going on in the world, or how i could help.  our military doesn't get the credit they deserve daily, because we forget about them, being more concerned about us ,in our own little worlds.  growing up (since when 9/11 happened i was in 5th grade) i can remember times when the war on terrorism was mentioned that i was thinking, "Is that war in what's that place really still going on?"  i was a kid then, but now i'm an adult (so-to-speak), and had i not made friends in the military i would still be rather ignorant. 

so here's my question:  how can a poor college student, female, dependent on her parents, trying to get good grades, doing research on the side, trying to magnify her calling, improving her spiritual self, & trying to be social, help with a war or natural disaster? 

the awkward sidewalk passerby smile

walking back and forth to school has taught me that its awkward to make eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk.  and you dont want to look like the mean girl (as my mother would say) and i have been told i'm intimidating as it is, so i dont really need another reason to be so.

there are a few options when you see you are coming upon somebody you don't know.
option a: look down at the ground quickly, and only back up when you've passed said stranger.
option b: make eye contact but look away and down, pretending you didn't.
option c: make eye contact, smile the tight lipped no teeth doesn't reach your eyes "you're a stranger but i'm smiling even though i'm not actually happy to see you" smile.
option d: make eye contact, smile a real smile, then glance away or down and perhaps an awkward giggle.
option e: make eye contact, smile a real smile, and greet them.

i often end up going with option c.

but when there is someone who actually takes the initiative and does option e, its really something.  i can still remember the times when someone has genuinely greeted me on the sidewalk even though they don't have a clue who i am.  its those people who are really impressive.

but its so much easier to do option c. easiest would be a, but i can manage c every once in awhile.

oh dear. i really am the mean girl aren't i?