becca: the murderess

i didnt mean to!
well i did think about it before i did it..for a long time

it was out of rage!
no i was actually kinda scared..more sad though

but i still feel terrible about it.
& that one is the truth.



i killed the poor spider in my sink! :(



here's what happened: i'm going to bed last night at two thirty and i need to wash my face, take my pills, brush teeth, etc, bedtime routine. but there is this spider in my sink! and i couldnt bring myself to squash him. there was no way! he just kept moving and i felt so bad for him.. plus he was bigger than the normal squashable spider. but he would try to get out of the sink so hard, then he would get to a certain point and fall backwards because the sink is slick..& i couldnt help but feel sorry for him. so i sat there and watched him for a long while..wondering if he could get out, but there was no way. i watched him build webs in the bottom of the sink too. it was crazy. kinda cool. but more sad. anyway i tried turning the water on, but his webs saved him, and he would just curl up into a ball and then be all sad looking, bobbing on top of the water..so i had to stop that. then i thought i could just share the sink with the spider, right? he doesnt go down the drain, so i'll just do my normal stuff while he's in there. but then i couldnt handle it. i had to watch him the whole time..i couldnt let my guard down while there was a spider around! so then i was trying to think of other ways to kill it cuz i could NOT try to chase that thing around with some toilet paper and squash it in my sink. i dont know what my problem was, i've done it before! i swear i have, and i don't have arachnophobia or anything. i think spiders are pretty cool actually.
so i did something wayy worse than squashing it. and i feel terrible! i sprayed it with 409 and hairspray. bad idea. he kinda started convulsing and then flipped over on his back and just twitched his legs trying to turn over again, but he couldnt even come close to managing it.. then i turned the water again and he finally went down the drain. :( that was like, the worst possible way of murdering a spider wasnt it? gahh. i'm a terrible person. i torture spiders. i turned on the water then made it hot too so i could wash my face...and ensure that he didnt come crawling back out of the drain. even though i poisoned him pretty bad. poor spider. i took a picture of him too, when he was alive. but i'll post that later. its time for a nap now. i'll dream of myself torturing poor innocent spiders just trying to get out of the terrible predicament they got themselves into. :(